Of Engagement rings and deadly weapons..

I'm not quite sure what the current trend on engagement rings is outside of the Garden Level (ie. basement) of the PT building but it seems like the rings are getting bigger and BIGGER with each new proposal.. So here's my take on it.

I think that there are criteria you need to meet for the size of ring you choose - the more you work out, the bigger the ring. Hey, you see those sparkly boulders and you'll know what I'm talking about... oh yeah.. pump some iron with those fingers .. a few hundred planks on the left finger... get all this done and you'll be in good shape to endure the weight of you new piece of jewellery!!!

When I say BIG/GIANORMOUS/GIGANTIC/COLOSSAL.. this is what I mean.. and this is the trend now in the "Garden Level" of the Program in Physical Therapy!!


Now, I know what you prudent, minimalists out there are thinking.. "what a waste.." but there is quite a multifold purpose to having gianormous accessories..

• These rings are SO bright, you can turn the lights out at night, burn a candle and let the candlelight refract through the ring (by ring I mean DIAMOND). Can you even imagine how much energy you would be saving.. and now if we would only think of a way to generate electricity from these mini solar systems we would have a whole host of very happy environmentalists.
• Speaking of light and refraction... the spark from these 3000 karat diamonds are so bright that you can potentially position your ring in the sunshine and blind your enemies (serves them right for giving you the evil eye... ).
  
• You can punch someone and while injuring the unfortunate person that crossed your path, you can leave a trademark, multi-level, cosmetically appealing pit in their face.
• Oh last... and my favorite and deadliest self defense technique - aim the edges of that ring at the jugular and what do you get..??? A Tiffany & Co style execution!!

Boys, start investing. You see all the long term advantages.. you save on energy, self-defense lessons, and medical bills for yourself coz your girl can now take care of herself - no more jumping in the line of fire to save the fair lady!


P.S. - No need to mention long lasting euphoria and a sudden boost in bedroom extracurriculars. The perks are never ending!!

Wanted!

They thought I could never shut up. Not even when I had my mouth full of food. They thought I was amusing, and would laugh at the slightest - even when I was NOT trying to be funny. The thought I had the weirdest logic, which made perfect sense to me, but never to them. They thought I was scandalous (at times). A few of them even thought I was intelligent. Jeez! I wonder what they were smoking.

Where did I go?

If someone finds the above mentioned "I" please let me know. I'm feeling very halved and desperately looking for her.

Told ya!!

I'm back. I'm running a new race, and I desperately want to see the finish line!

So it's been a year, and maybe I was missed, maybe I wasn't, but all this while I missed my sanity. I did have some in fleeting moments though.....

I'm finally in PT school (in other words a trial separation from the real world. Real world with people. With BOYS!!!!) and although it's like a dream come true I am subjected to "performing skills" I would never in my whole life have imagined.... So here goes..here are a few of my newly acquired "skills"

• I can feel you up on the valid pretext of "palpating" (I have felt up more women in more inappropriate places than the wildest fantasy ever, UGH!! I need to see more of the male community...know that they exist...somewhere on the planet)
  
• ..measure all the insignificant movements your tiniest joints make...
• figure out our body like the "road map" to your "movement disorders"... (that's just soooo much blah!!)
  
• think of food names for almost everything in a close-to-rotting cadavers and STILL be able to ingest the same food.... (you know...like how human fat looks like mac n cheese?)
  
• look at you walk and tell you when and where you need to get freaking corn caps for your soles...nice haan?
• Ohhhhh...how could I forget this? I can pay attention to a lecture and study for a different exam AT THE SAME TIME!
  

See, I can go on and on bajaoing my own dhol, but hey...there's something called humility too right?

Peace out!

The finish line is just the beginning of a whole new race.

Licence to torture

Peoples..I am done!! 3 years of the most nonsensical and irrelevant classes. 1 year of heartbreaks (yes, breaks). 1 year of confusion. And I am finally done.

I take the "walk" this Saturday and although I am still in shock I think I am happy..and a littal excited. Being excited only works if you DON'T think of the money you drained just to get a 8 1/2 x 10 piece of paper with your name in some stylish font! All said and done I now have an official license to tell people that they are obese by 0.5kg..ahhh the cheap thrills!!

Unfortunately, family (by blood) will not be able to make it, but the family I have here are more than anyone can ask for. R, R, P, S..you guys are the best, MUAH!!

Seetay, if you haven't been here in a while look out for pics from the ceremony. Moi plans to post!

Hopefully, all interesting things should happen now that coll is done. Hopefully, I should start posting more often. Hopefully, I shall win the lottery and get the Nobel Prize for doing so!

Ummeed se hi to duniya kaayam hai!

Yello! I'm green, and what are you today?

We all live in reality right? Unless we live in a perpetual dream, which is actually a warped, pink heart-shaped version of reality. So then why would the inane, mundane, horribly biscuit coloured details of someone else's life be of ANY interest to anyone. Who knows..but hey, it sells!!

On this same note and recently acquired thought debilitation, I have come up with this idea of painting my life. My mouth works overtime anyways and it's too damn hard to find a script writer. Paints are better. Just pages and pages of solid colour - and then polka dots, stripes, checks, etc for when I'm feeling creative.

So now that we have these details taken care of, there's this one thing that been bugging me. If you say you are blue, universally you are conveying you are sad; if I situate yellow with being happy, then does green mean I am confused? Or bipolar?

Today, I feel like a multi-coloured, polka-dotted, graffiti wall.